Shop til you Drop
So, getting back to the sample sale. Before we proceed, a quick explanation for those of you not quite in-the-know about the intricacies of the Wedding Industrial Complex:
When you try on wedding gowns at higher end boutiques, you’re really just trying on samples. Your dress will be made to order instead of purchased off the rack, and those same sample dresses will be used over and over again by other brides until they start to fall apart or go out of style. At this point, they’re rounded up and sent to a warehouse to be a sold; this is when the fashion-conscious-but-fiscally-responsible bride swoops in.
Except in our case this past weekend, we were a little late in the swooping department, which is how I found myself standing all alone at the Navy Yard, very much not at the front of the line.
I knew I needed to make some allies, because there’s nothing like a BHLDN free-for-all to put the ‘zilla in “Bridezilla” and when you’re dealing with a first come, first served situation, you need all the help you can get.
This is why most brides come with their mom and/or bridesmaids for a divide-and-conquer technique but seeing as my mother had the audacity to be in Cuba at the time, I started chatting up the group of women in line behind me.
You have to be careful with sample sale alliances, especially if you want them to actually work unlike that half assed Cruz/Kasich debacle. (What the hell was that by the way?)
It’s best to form an alliance with a bride who is not your size, this way you’re not competing over gowns. The exception is if you can find a bride who shares your size but not your taste; then you can tag team the sale and spend the whole time swapping gowns.
At any rate, I offered my new found companions full access to my collection of belts and sashes, should they need to borrow them for visualization purposes, and informed the bride (who was carrying a full length mirror) that the advertisement said no mirrors would be allowed inside so she might want to stash hers in her car now instead of wasting valuable shopping time once we got to the front of the line…
Fieldwork in Stilettos 
3 Responses to “Shop til you Drop”
After hearing your extended version yesterday, this is still funny!
But, don’t you already have two dresses?
“Wedding Industrial Complex”… SAYS IT ALL. If I get married it will be in a red and black f*ck-the-industry dress. 😀