Finally: The Wedding Date’s Kids

By the time Friday afternoon rolls around, I’m kind of freaking out about meeting The Wedding Date’s kids.  What if they don’t like me?  What if we have nothing to talk about?  What if they think I’m lame or terrible at board games?  And, worst of all, what if my relationship with their dad doesn’t work out?  There’s nothing to indicate that it won’t, but if it doesn’t, I’m going to have to say goodbye to The Wedding Date and his kids and kids, I’m pretty sure, are way worse than dogs.

Fortunately, I work at a school where blended families are the norm, rather than the exception.  So I poll my co-workers and discover that just about every last one of them has been through this before.  The general consensus is to be friendly but don’t be their friend.  Be an adult. 

Be an adult.

An adult.

I can handle that.

Unfortunately, I’m not so sure what an adult is supposed to wear when they’re meeting their significant other’s kids for the first time.  I nailed my outfit when I met The Wedding Date’s friends last month (I guessed that the majority of the women would be wearing boots with skinny jeans and dressed to match) but kids?  For a night at the arcade?

I wanted to look nice, and somewhat cute but not hot.  (More Claire Dunphy than Gloria Pritchett, if you get my drift, but after eighteen months of “fieldwork” I don’t have too many “soccer mom” outfits in my closet).

After emptying the majority of my drawers onto my bed and discovering, to my great horror, that I really need to stop shopping in the Juniors Department, I decide on my casual jeans, my black patent leather clogs and a black and white polka dot shirt with a camisole underneath.  (The last thing I want is for one of The Wedding Date’s kid to catch site of my bra.)

Now I’m running late (what else is new?) so I high tail it up I-95 and miss my exit (again, what else is new?) but I manage to make it to The Wedding Date’s house exactly one minute ahead of schedule.

After the initial introductions, we pile into his car and head to a restaurant called Surf Taco.  Being the mature adult that I am, I wait for the kids to unwrap their straws to pull the very same stunt I pulled on their father the night of our first date; once they’re un-armed, I blow my wrapper across the table, striking the eldest in the shoulder.

Everyone laughs and a moment later, I am granted my first high five of the night.


Eventually, we move onto dumb blonde jokes (after politely establishing that I am not, in fact, a “natural blonde.”)

Dumb blonde jokes happen to be my thing and even though The Wedding Date looks vaguely horrified as his children rattle off one after the other, I finally take a deep breath and ask, “How do you drown a blonde?”

“How?” his kids demand.

“Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool!”

This earns me another high five.  In fact, the kids think this is hysterical.  I’m not sure that I’m doing such a great job at being an adult, but at least they like me, and that’s a start.  I’ll have plenty of time to earn their respect at the arcade…

8 Responses to “Finally: The Wedding Date’s Kids”

  1. canti

    Awwwww … you’re making me miss NJ … Surf Taco rocks. The Belmar one was pretty much around the corner from my apartment. I’m guessing you were at the one closer to the boardwalk that actually HAS arcades since Skeeball was also part of the evening (not giving the town to avoid potential stalkers/invasion of privacy).

    It’s certainly a fine line to walk when a significant others kids are involved … just be glad that none of those kids are OLDER than you (I had that problem)! All in all … you’re social — I have confidence that you hit just the right note with them 😉

  2. Jill

    Oh, man! My 11 yo son Jonah LOVES blonde jokes. I’m giving him that one. He especially loves them because his sister’s three besties are blonde. Sounds good so far!

  3. Zak

    “And, worst of all, what if my relationship with their dad doesn’t work out? There’s nothing to indicate that it won’t, but if it doesn’t, I’m going to have to say goodbye to The Wedding Date and his kids and kids, I’m pretty sure, are way worse than dogs.”

    I did warn you, right? I really hope it continues to work out for you two. He and you both seem open to where things are and where they’re going, which is something I didn’t have, unfortunately.

    I can’t give you any advice on dealing with the kids, because you did exactly what I would do and I think you’re golden.

  4. Landlord

    We never went to Surf Taco? did we miss this when we lived there? Oh well, since our family rocks at arcades, (not with video games- but old school stuff) I’m sure you did fine. Now you have me thinking of WhacAMole, skeeball, water pistol races (my specialty) and of course, fried dough–although the best is from NH and Montreal, not the Jersey Shore. This weather is making me think a shore trip is in the near future.

    • canti

      Water pistol races were MY specialty, too! Mostly because I always had good “dead aim” … I still have the big Tweety Bird that I won for Kim at the County Fair one year; he actually had the ‘nads to doubt my ability!

      I like that when I moved I was closer to family, but this particular corner of New England is sorely lacking in boardwalks and ocean access. Tag sales and really great farmer’s markets make up for some of it, but sometimes I really miss the smell of salt in the air … oh, and Kohrs orangeade and Strollo’s italian ice … sigh.


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