Writing left handed

Two Men, One Martini Bar

It’s not as bad as it sounds, although I suppose any woman who accidentally invites two men to Thanksgiving dinner ought to provide some sort of explanation.

(Note: I’d intended to post this on Friday but Hoopers Island is in the middle of nowhere so I’ve been going through internet withdrawal…)

Let’s start at the beginning, shall we?  Once upon a time, a rather lonely 25 year old decided to try her luck at online dating.  Somewhere along the line, she stumbled upon the profile of a man from Pittsburgh and despite her initial impressions of the unfortunate fellow (“way too intense”) she somehow deluded herself into believing that he might be “the one.”

A year into their correspondence, he made arrangements to visit and even though he wasn’t entirely at liberty to spend a weekend in Philadelphia at the time, he did just that.

Was it love at first sight?  Not quite.  Not even at all, actually.  But a year is a long time to wait.  And although there was very definitely a “spark,” it was a spark of the all-consuming variety— the kind that leaves you feeling elated one moment and completely wrung out the next.

Shortly after this initial visit, our hapless protagonist found herself at a wedding.  There she stumbled upon a man who actually made her smile.  He was not without his faults (he doesn’t allow cookies into his living room!) and he comes with a few complications but he is everything the Man from Pittsburgh is not and—lo and behold—dates with him don’t result in tears.

In fact, our protagonist rather enjoys them.

Here’s where a sane individual would declare, “The End!” and issue an invitation to The Wedding Date for Thanksgiving dinner.  But it’s never that simple.  The Richter family celebrates Thanksgiving on Black Friday and the man in question will be spending the day at a friend’s wedding with—wait for it—an ex girlfriend.


Meanwhile, the Man from Pittsburgh has been calling.  And texting.  And begging me not to give up on “us.”  I’ve been doing my best to ignore him but there is something—something I don’t even understand—that has prevented me from cutting ties, despite my intention to do exactly that after his brother’s wedding last month.

During a particularly exasperating conversation last week, I finally slammed my fist onto my desk and demanded, “What do you want from me?”

The Man from Pittsburgh’s reply came as quite a shock: I just want to see you.

Nothing dramatic.  Nothing sarcastic.  Just plain and simple, which is how I inadvertently ended up inviting two men to the annual Hoopers Island Black Friday Martini Bar Soiree.

“What are you going to do if they both show up?” my dad asked.

As if I hadn’t already thought of that!

“The Martini Bar Soiree comprises only 25% of the holiday weekend,” I explained.  “I’ll invite one for Thursday and Friday and one for Saturday and Sunday.  As long as everyone sticks to the schedule, it’ll be fine.”

In fact, in the event of an accidental overlap, I could have gone with Kate’s idea of the Black Friday Duel, in which The Wedding Date and Date #7 could compete in various events (such as The Martini Bar Mix Off, The Bonfire Build Off, The Sea Glass Scramble and something involving kayaks) but before you write me off for having gone completely insane, I have one final confession to make: I never actually invited Date #7.

I issued a casual, backhanded, quasi-invitation several weeks ago but never mentioned it again until Thursday, at which point I knew it would be too late to make travel plans.  Date #7 may be quite keen to see me, but given this histrionics that have characterized every single one of our previous interactions, I’m less keen to see him.

And that’s the story of how I find myself dateless, once again, for the Martini Bar Soiree.

Speaking of stories, I know that I’ve been rather remiss lately.  Between last week’s conference and this week’s trip to Hoopers Island, I’ve fallen terribly behind on all extracurricular activities, including both dating and blogging, but don’t worry: our regularly scheduled programming will resume first thing Monday morning.

5 Responses to “Two Men, One Martini Bar”

  1. Lost in France

    I am sure there is a moral to this story, but I can not at the moment work out what it is.
    I remember when I was young, my uncle took me to the local toy shop and said I could have anything I wanted. I could not cope with this concept, as it was the complete opposite to my parents.
    I left with nothing.
    Sometimes to much choice is a bad thing.

  2. Kate Ferguson Writes

    The protagonist surely benefited from a respite from her gentlemen acquiantances. Perhaps The Wedding Date’s aloofness and contact with his ex lady friend will give him some of the hot and cold appeal possessed by Date 7?

  3. nancy peterson

    It’s fun to get to know another side of you
    thanks for the blog
    do you send this to Meghan as well?
    I know she would enjoy it.
    nancy peterson WWGR

    • Kat Richter

      Thanks, Nancy. I’ve recently added the blog link to my email signature so I’m not sure whether Meghan has seen it or not. I’ll go ahead and send it to her 🙂


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