Writing left handed

Remind Me: Why am I Going Speed Dating AGAIN?

Philadelphia datingI got a bit distracted during yesterday’s post.  As such, I forgot to explain why I’m going speed dating in the first place.  Lest you think it’s because I’m bored (or simply short on men to occupy my time), let me assure of the contrary: I’m not.  Between trying to wrap-up this year’s classes and prep for the show I’m co-producing this fall, I am pulling my hair out and aside from this blog, I haven’t put pen to paper in weeks.  (I’m actually a little embarrassed to be attending the Philadelphia Writer’s Conference this weekend because I feel like I don’t have anything to show for myself.)

But back to dating.

It would seem that My 50th Date’s regard for me has fizzled out (not that it was particularly hot to begin with).  I haven’t heard from him since the day after we went rock climbing and although I’m sure there are plenty of logical explanations for this, I’m going to go with this one: he was appalled by my poor mountaineering skills and never wants to see me again.

That leaves Date #7 (the man from across the state who I’ve yet to meet), some 24-year old from Match (who messaged me just before I ended my subscription) and a guy from my college (who’s attempting to convince me that a meaningless hook up would be good for me).

So as you can see, even with the loss of My 50th Date, I still have three viable options.  I neither need nor want to introduce anyone else into the mix (especially because I’m convinced that Date #7 and I actually have a shot) so then, why the speed dating?

It’s because I got an email from my mom a few weeks ago telling me she’d seen a half price offer on Dealyo for Dine and Dash, Philly’s resident speed dating agency, and had taken it upon herself to buy me a ticket.

Now don’t get me wrong: I love my mom—I love her even/especially when she sends me emails to the effect of “I found a coupon for [fill in the blank] and thought it might be fun”— I just don’t know how I’m going to explain this to my would-be PSM’s tonight.

“What brings me here?  Well, it’s kind of a long story… I write a blog about dating, I live with my parents, my mom really likes online shopping…”

No matter which way I spin it, it doesn’t sound good.  So I’m gonna need a better story.  Any ideas?  I’m not looking to avoid the truth, per se, just to gloss over the less glamorous aspects of my personal life.

(Gold stars, unending gratitude and perhaps a shout out to the best suggestion!)

8 Responses to “Remind Me: Why am I Going Speed Dating AGAIN?”

  1. Zak

    What brings you here:
    -a car, too much wit and a masochistic streak.
    -you heard there were men
    -wait, this ISN’T Arby’s?
    -do you have any in a size 6’0″ plus?
    -I got lost
    -woah, buddy, slow down. What brings YOU here?
    -I don’t like answering sensitive questions before getting vital stats for my spreadsheet, erm, my…
    -I am job

    Start there.

    Reply
  2. aka gringita

    OK, well, I’m a dating failure in general, but I do well at speed dating, so… not sure how much weight you should put on my suggestion. Something along these lines, perhaps:

    “Oh, a friend of mine heard about this” (not stated: a mom who finds you coupons definitely qualifies as a friend) “and thought it would be fun. She couldn’t make it after all” (not said: what with being my mom and all, plus she didn’t really *offer* to come) “but I thought I’d give it a go anyway. You never know who you might meet. It’s sort of an interesting experience, isn’t it? And you? What brings you here?”

    Reply
  3. Nicole Basaraba

    You could say: “Its more efficient to screen if someone is your PSM (or you could say: compatible with someone) in (enter time here of speed date here) by getting the interview over with now and spending more time during the date having fun.”

    Its a quick, honest answer and also leaves an eligible bachelor intrigued about what fun they could have with you on a real date.

    Reply
  4. mydatingprescription

    OMG, I can relate. I actually need to take some time and write a post about the fact that my mother took it upon herself to create a profile for me on SeniorPeopleMeet.com! I’m only 43 for fuck’s sake! I think she was secretly shopping for herself.

    Reply
  5. awindram

    You could try a different persona and accent with each PSM. Maybe utilize favourite fictional characters. Emma Bovary, Elizabeth Bennet, etc. If the PSM gets the literary reference then maybe they’re worth considering.

    Reply
  6. Landlord

    To be fair, I bought the “deal” because I KNEW it would be great blog fodder and who knows? And you know I can’ t pass up a bargain 😉

    Reply

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