Welcome to the new and improved “After I Quit My Day Job.” You’ll notice that I’ve replaced the Philadelphia skyline with a background of delightful lavender polka dots. Why? Well, to force you to consider post-colonial notions of displacement and global citizenry, of course! Did you really need me to explain that?
In all seriousness, as I approach the one year anniversary of my return to the US, I’m glad that planning for The Preschool’s Holiday Song Concert is keeping me too busy to think about the fact that I’d intended to observe this anniversary from the other side of the Atlantic—the London side. Since the genesis of this blog, I’ve changed my header photographs from Brighton to Venice, from Venice to Ephesus, from Ephesus to Edinburgh and finally from Edinburgh to Philadelphia in an attempt to convince myself that this—the City of Brotherly Love—is where I belong. But I still have my doubts.
Hence the fact that I’m more comfortable with lavender polka dots and an allegiance to nowhere (and no one) in particular.
In lieu of today’s post, I’ve written a little manifesto on the subject of serial dating, which you’ll find at the top of the page under the heading marked “The Experiment.” I’ve also answered a few more of your questions, so be sure to take a look.
Once you’re done reading “The Experiment” you should probably scroll down and leave a comment (Date #17 has been too busy to email me lately and given that today’s paper was filled with depressing reports on Haiti’s growing cholera epidemic and Israel’s intention to build an additional 1,300 housing units for Jewish settlers in occupied East Jerusalem, I’m in dire need of some fun reading.)
Once you’ve left a comment, you should direct your attention to the bottom of the serial dater manifesto where it says “Spread the Love!” and click on your preferred method of social networking. My site traffic has taken a hit since I’ve stopped posting every day and I find these statistics nearly as depressing as today’s headlines because in order to publish a best seller, you need an agent, and in order to get an agent you have to either sleep with a bunch of guys at Duke and then create a PowerPoint presentation about them, or, you can not sleep with a bunch of guys from Match.com and then write a charming little blog about them. The latter of these options, however, is proving rather difficult so, for your convenience, I’ve compiled the following suggestions for you to cut and paste into your browser when sharing.
1) Check out this blog! Can you believe I went to college with this girl? We always knew Kat was a bit strange… what, with that foreigner she was dating freshman year and that older man she brought to our senior formal. Why didn’t she settle down with a nice Goucher boy while she had the chance?
2) Check out this blog! Can you believe I taught this girl? Obviously she still has a lot to learn.
3) Check out this blog! Can you believe I hired this girl? What a waste of administrative talent.
4) Check out this blog! Can you believe I gave birth to this girl? (I’ll let you finish that one for yourself, Mom.)
5) Check out this blog! Can you believe I dated this girl? Run away. Run far, far, away.
6) And finally: check out this blog! I have no idea who this girl is but I found her blog through WordPress and if you think your love life is a mess, just take a look at hers and you’ll feel much better!
There. I’ve done the hard part for you. Now all you have to do is cut and paste and click “share” and then, when all of your Facebook friends come flocking to The Experiment, I’ll feel much better about the state my world, if not the rest of today’s headlines.