All posts tagged: stretch marks

To Tone or Not to Tone?

Well here’s a disappointing discovery: you can’t crunch your way to a six pack in 24 hours (nor 24 years for that matter, and yes, I have been trying for almost that long).  It’s not that I want an actual six-pack, especially because as I’ve said before, it’s just dinner with Date #9 on Thursday so unless I buy myself some sexy underwear between now and then and arrive at the restaurant clad in nothing else, he’s not even going to see my rock hard abs. (And even if he did—which would require me acquiring both the abs and the “outfit” to display them— what would he say?  “Hey Kat, lovely to see you, and I must say, great six-pack!”) It’s just that I’d like to be a little more toned in certain areas.  Like my arms, for instance, my stomach, my inner thighs, my outer thighs, my posterior thighs (oh wait—I think there’s a word for that.  Hmm… derriere. Good thing I like to pretend I can speak French) and I’d love it if …

Sublime Skin (Part 2)

Are you sitting down?  I hope so, because this is going to come as a complete shock: the L’Oreal Paris Body Expertise Sublime Skin Patch does not make your skin sublime.  At least not if you cut the sample patch in half, spend eight hours walking around with the “Concentrated Caffeine Cx Agent” stuck to your thighs and refuse to invest in the recommended day and night creams unless the Body Smoothing Complex does its thing.  Well folks, my thighs are not smooth.  In fact, they look the same as they did before.  Moral of the story?  There’s no quick fix to cellulite. I should have known.  I went through the same thing with stretch marks a few months ago when I was living in London.  My parents decided to take me on a cruise as my graduation gift and I dropped a day’s wages on Oxford Street for the necessary accoutrements: a new bikini and my first ever bottle of fake tan.  For the record, I had never done fake tan until then, but …