All posts tagged: Kate Middleton

The Non-ultimatum Ultimatum

Fear is a powerful motivator.  I know this because for the first time in my relationship with The Wedding Date—actually, for the first time in my life—I find myself afraid of losing someone.  In the past, I’ve always been the one to walk.  The one to decide that this relationship is going to take a lot of work and the reward (the relationship itself) isn’t worth it.  But now the tables are turned.  Now The Wedding Date is telling me, “Listen, I don’t want this to sound like an ultimatum but I need to know: do you want to be with me?  And if you want to be with be, can you handle being with my kids?” It seems like such an unfair question.  Especially when my preschoolers have their final concert of the year tomorrow which means I’ve got to finish laminating their class project today, stuff all of their year-end goodie bags, transport all of their music and props and mats from the studio down to the auditorium, spike the stage, set up …

Sequins, Starpower and a Stranger’s Question

May 1st?  Seriously?  When did that happen?  After April 30th, presumably, but still: I can’t believe May is here already!  Today will find me once again at the Greater Philadelphia Expo Center, a veritable hell hole on the side of the road in Valley Forge.  (And then we wonder why Philly has such a bed rep… the “Expo” center is little better than a warehouse!  When you add a stage, strobe lights, smoke machines and several hundred teenagers in stage make up and sequins, its gets a little bit better but only just a little.) I’m excited about Day Two of the Starpower regionals, especially because I intend to arrive in time to actually see my students perform this time around.  Yesterday, you see, was a minor catastrophe that found me stuck behind a tractor trailer on the exit ramp off of I-76 for 45 minutes (the entire trip should have taken 45 minutes!) and swearing like a sailor.  Why?  Well, one of my co-workers had just texted me to ask “Are u here?”  Evidently …

Four Things One Should NOT Do Whilst Single

1) Listen to Train.  Marry Me is going to make me run myself off the road one of these days.  (You should probably stop letting me borrow your car, Mom.) 2) Watch three back-to-back episodes of Wedded to Perfection, followed by Whose Wedding is it Anyway? and finally an entire season of Say ‘Yes’ to the Dress. You know it’s bad when your dad starts to recognize the season’s most memorable bridezillas and can predict which of the fledgling Kleinfeld’s consultants is gonna get the axe (Damn you, Netflix-on-Demand!) 3) Wake up at 4:00am to watch the nuptials of Prince William and Kate Middleton.  Nothing like a fairy-tale wedding to plunge a single girl into the depths of the despair (especially when you’ve got Princess Eugenie waddling around in that awful Vivienne Westwood number.  Now that was just plain depressing.  And Princess Beatrice—that hat!  What was she thinking?  I’ve seen classier reindeer antlers at the dollar store.) 4) Go shopping.  Three evening gowns, two cocktail dresses and one wedding gown later, I am ready for …

A Very Sad Day for Me and Prince William

I’d like to respectfully request a moment of silence this morning.  Why?  Well obviously I’m in mourning. It’s 4:00am here in the US.  I’m still in my PJs, sacked out on the couch in the living room, and although I generally prefer to wallow in ignorance so far as world news is concerned, I am on top of it today.  This is because today is a very important day: today is the day when some innocuous brunette who-is-not-me will marry HRH Prince William and I will finally have to admit to myself that I won’t be joining the Royal Family any time soon. Of course, there’s still Harry.  (One of my supervisors reminded me of this fact via text message yesterday.)  But I don’t really consider Harry a viable option.  As a friend from the UK pointed out a while back, anyone who gets that much media training and still has the audacity to show up at a fancy dress party wearing a Nazi swastika on his arm isn’t exactly the brightest bulb in the …