Month: February 2012

If You Bake a Boyfriend a Cake…

It was bound to happen.  And I knew it was bound to happen which is why, upon deciding that I would be the one to the bring the cake to The Wedding Date’s birthday dinner, I got in touch with his BFF to see which sort of cake of prefers and decide upon a nice, simple, dark chocolate, courtesy of Dunkin Hines. I thought about rifling through the book of chocolate recipes my last boyfriend got me to find something a bit more decadent—maybe something made with ginger or orange zest.  But I knew better than to attempt a new recipe at 6:00am the day of The Wedding Date’s birthday dinner, especially as I’d be meeting all of his friends for the first time and driving straight from my students’ rehearsal to the restaurant, thereby ensuring that I would A) arrive late and B) get lost along the way. It’s not that I’m a pessimist; I’m a realist.  And even though I love to bake, I know that baking under pressure is a recipe for …

Rate Your Date?

It was bound to happen sooner or later.  Yesterday, I got an email on my public account—my SingleinSouthPhilly@gmail.com account— from a fellow Match.com user.  A fellow female Match.com user who evidently had just gone a date with one of the men I dated (and wrote about) last year. Hey, This is a totally random and inappropriate question, but is the guy you wrote about in this post named [well, actually I’m not going to reveal that.  Sorry folks]? I Googled him because I went out on a date with him via match.com. My friends and I used to make fun of “pickup artist” type guys who pots [sic; presumably she meant post?] on internet forums and when we were on the date, he started using the techniques that these guys used to chat about and told me that he does life coaching on the side.  Lo and behold, I found a series of creepy yet funny podcasts about how to pick up women, as well as his company he’s attempting to start up and the iPhone apps. …

The Power of the Bikini vs. The Power of the Board Game

“Do you want to see me in a bikini or not?” It was New Years Day, and The Wedding Date had been talking with a friend’s husband about board games for the past fifteen minutes. Not finding myself particularly interested in their conversation, I had turned my attention to an old MySpace video that said friend’s sister had pulled up on my lap top. This, by the way, was not just any video.  It was a video that we ourselves had filmed during a trip to Florida several years ago and if my memory serves me correctly, the idea had come to us after several glasses of “special lemonade.”  We decided to film a remake of Fergie’s “Fergaliscious” except we rewrote the lyrics to describe the “slug-like” behavior in which we’d been engaging for the past several days. We called the video “Slugaliscious” and choreographed an entire synchronized swimming routine to go with it, although being that none of us had any experience in synchronized swimming, it was more synchronized rolling into the pool, followed …

Sneakers and Velvet Work on Arthur’s Seat

This week’s photo was in fact taken in Edinburgh (congratulations to Siobhan, aka Gringita and Diane).  I’m wearing a velvet blazer and a teal t-shirt borrowed from my college roommate.  Why?  Well, I was living in London at the time.  And my roommate (the same one who almost didn’t speak to me after Montreal) was moving to Edinburgh for the first of a four-year course in veterinary medicine. Thankfully, we’d made up since the Montreal incident and I took a weekend off from work (and writing my dissertation) to help her get settled in. Being the sensible girl that I am, I brought approximately seven pairs of shoes for a three-night stay.  I did concede to include one pair of sneakers amongst my stilettos, but I did not bother to bring a t-shirt. Or a sweatshirt. Or anything even vaguely appropriate for non-clubbing activities (such as hiking) hence the velvet blazer and my roommate’s t-shirt. Still, I think I look pretty darn happy in that picture. Probably because I’d spent most of the weekend “conducting …

Bagels, M&Ms and W(h)ine

It’s been one of those days, by which I mean I’ve spent the past 18 hours or so drowning my sorrows in carbohydrates and whining to The Wedding Date about This Week’s Crisis (which unfortunately has to do with The School so I can’t very well whine about it on the internet). In any event, it’s picture day again.  You know: the day when I post a picture of me looking dimwitted somewhere else for a change and hope that my former travel buddies don’t get too angry at me when I confess that yes, actually, some of the things that happened on that trip could have gone a bit… better. So here you go.  First one to guess gets a prize (which will probably amount to nothing more than a shout out this week because although I’d fully intended to sort something out– something cool–  This Week’s Crisis happened and I decided to top off my carb-fest with wine and M&Ms and now I have a splitting headache.) Lucky me. Which is a hint. …

Is 26 Old Enough to Buy Your Own Socks?

I have issues with tissues.  And socks.  And tampons for that matter.  As in I never remember to buy them—any of them— and whenever I find myself in need (by which I mean dire need) I end up wandering around the house, raiding various closets and pantries while ranting, “Why hasn’t anyone bought any f*cking tissues/socks/tampons?” It never occurs to me that I could simply purchase my own tissues/socks/tampons until I’m stumbling around with cold feet and a runny nose and really, who wants to go to Target then? I have been to no less than seven drug stores in the past week (mainly in order to acquire the best pick of the half-priced Valentine’s Day candy) and not once did I remember to buy tissues. Nor did I think to pick up some extra socks while I was raiding the half price bins at Target. (What can I say?  Chocolate is generally the main motivation behind any and all trips out of the house.) Instead, I keep “borrowing” socks from my mom and anxiously …

What Went Wrong? For iPhone???

There’s an app for that.  And today, “that” includes personalized dating advice thanks to “Wot Went Wrong?” a new app that allows users to gather feedback about their dating “skills” (or lack thereof). Basically, the dumpee uses the app to send the dumper a request for feedback regarding his or her decision to end the relationship.  The dumper can then choose from a generic list of “turn offs” (i.e. poor hygiene, incompatibility, lack of physical attraction) and sends these back to the rejected party, in the hopes that his or her “insight” (and the accompanying suggestions for dealing with the selected criticisms) will the dumpee improve his or her chances the next time around. This video—although rather infuriating in its perpetuation of the “Why hasn’t he called?” trope— explains the whole thing: WotWentWrong Explanatory Video from WotWentWrong on Vimeo. When I first read about WotWentWrong, I had your typical octogenarian reaction (“What will they think of next?”) except I’m not an octogenarian, and when I sat back to think about it, I had to admit …

Okay Obi Wan, Now I Need Help

It’s happening.  Actually, it started happening several weeks ago but I didn’t realize just how bad it had gotten until The Wedding Date and I went to the see Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace. Not expecting to find myself particularly enamored of the film, I brought a bag of Cheez-Its, a sleeve of Girl Scout cookies and two miniature bottles of wine, one for me and one for The Wedding Date (give me a little credit).  I figured I’d need some way to entertain myself in case the official Hasbro Star Wars Fighter Pods which we’d received with our tickets weren’t quite as exciting as the website would have lead one to believe. We made our way to a pair of seats in the back of the theatre and that’s when the trouble started. There were kids.  Everywhere. And they were totally ruining the movie. I like kids but I do not like kids on weekends.  Weekends are for recharging, for eating chocolate chip pancakes with one’s boyfriend and for engaging in grown …